Learning to speak Latin…Mrs. Orpheus…

A blog reader (thank you!) sent me a list of test blunders (real ones, apparently) that cracked me up this morning. Enjoy!

Q: What was Sir Walter Raleigh famous for? A: He is a noted figure in history because he invented cigarettes and started a craze for bicycles.

Q: What did Mahatma Gandhi and Genghis Khan have in common? A: Unusual names.

Q: Name one of the early Romans’ greatest achievements. A: Learning to speak Latin.

Q: Name one measure that can be put into place to avoid river flooding in times of excessive rainfall (e.g. in Mississippi ) A: Flooding in areas such as the Mississippi may be avoided by placing a number of dames into the river.

Q: Name six animals that live specifically in the Arctic. A: Two polar bears; three (crossed out), four seals

Q: Assess Fashion House plc’s choice to locate its factory near Birmingham. Is Birmingham the right location for this type of business? A: No. People from Birmingham aren’t very fashionable.

Q: How does Romeo’s character develop throughout the play? A: It doesn’t, it’s just self, self, self all the way through.

Q: Name the wife of Orpheus whom he attempted to save from the underworld. A: Mrs Orpheus

Q: Where was the American Declaration of Independence signed? A: At the bottom.

Q: What happens during puberty to a boy? A: He says goodbye to his childhood – enters adultery.

Q: State three drawbacks of hedgerow removal. A: 1. All the cows will escape. 2. The cars drive into the field. 3. There is nowhere to hide.

Q: What is the meaning of the word ‘varicose’? A: close by.

Q: What is a fibula? A: A little lie.

Q: Why would living close to a mobile phone mast cause ill health? A: You might walk into it.

Q: Joanna works in an office. Her computer is a stand-alone system. What is a stand-alone computer system? A: It doesn’t come with a chair.

Q: Steve is driving his car. He is travelling at 60 feet/second and the speed limit is 40 mph. Is Steve speeding? A: He could find out by checking his speedometer.

Q: Give a reason why people would want to live near power lines. A: You get your electricity faster.

Q: Where was Hadrian’s Wall built? A: Around Hadrian’s garden.

Q: The race of people known as Malays come from which country? A: Malaria

Q: What is a vibration? A: There are good vibrations and bad vibrations. Good vibrations were discovered in the 1960s.

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