Teacher: “Nick, what is the past participle of the verb to ring?”
Nick: “What do you think it is?”
Teacher: “I don’t think, I KNOW!”
Nick: “I don’t think I know, either!”
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an “I”.
Student: I is the…
Teacher: Stop! Never put ‘is’ after an “I”. Always put ‘am’ after an “I”.
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
Two cows are standing in a field.
One says to the other “Are you worried about Mad Cow Disease?”
The other one says “No, it doesn’t worry me in the least, I’m a horse…”
Last but not least, try this one on your friends and family (I got a few guffaws out of this one..both my parents fell for it…hehe):
“Spell SPOT three times.”
“S P O T , S P O T , S P O T”
“What do you do when you come to a green light?”
(answer is invariably=) “Stop!”
“What, at a GREEN light?”